I had my normal quarterly nephrologists appointment today.
It wasn't great. It was predictably not great. I've lost more kidney function (down to 16%). My potassium & phosphates are creeping up. The fatigue is a predictably not good sign. I'm very predictably right where we thought I'd be.
It sucks as much as I thought it would, by the way.
Today Nick told me that he couldn't be a kidney donor for me. It isn't that he can't give a kidney. It is simply that if it failed: if he gave up that much and lost anyway - he knows he can't deal. I respect that. I'm glad he came to it before I had to draw in on poster board with crayons for him. It still really REALLY fucking sucked to hear. I actually think he had the harder end of that conversation, even so.
What does all this mean? Dialysis might be happening. Hey, shit happens. I'm still a REALLY good candidate for a transplant, and who knows? Maybe the right dead-guy parts will show up when I need them to.
I'm trying to stay positive.
I am.
It has just been one helluva day.
It wasn't great. It was predictably not great. I've lost more kidney function (down to 16%). My potassium & phosphates are creeping up. The fatigue is a predictably not good sign. I'm very predictably right where we thought I'd be.
It sucks as much as I thought it would, by the way.
Today Nick told me that he couldn't be a kidney donor for me. It isn't that he can't give a kidney. It is simply that if it failed: if he gave up that much and lost anyway - he knows he can't deal. I respect that. I'm glad he came to it before I had to draw in on poster board with crayons for him. It still really REALLY fucking sucked to hear. I actually think he had the harder end of that conversation, even so.
What does all this mean? Dialysis might be happening. Hey, shit happens. I'm still a REALLY good candidate for a transplant, and who knows? Maybe the right dead-guy parts will show up when I need them to.
I'm trying to stay positive.
I am.
It has just been one helluva day.
