This keeps coming up. . .

Its been a recurring theme in my life for about 2 weeks now.

Working on a relationship. Or relationships - Your mileage may vary.

It seems that working on relationships seems to be universal, but I've come to the conclusion lately that polyamorous peoples must really ENJOY doing so. It seems that its a whole lot of work for the relationship to hold together and function properly. Like a complicated machine. Which isn't to say that simple machines (i.e. monogamous relationships) don't require maintenance, they do. Absofragginloutely. But it just seems to me that the more parts you add, the harder each part has to work to make sure that the whole is functioning properly.

So maybe that - ultimately - is the difference between poly people and monogamous people. Its not the sex, its not the love, its that poly people like to tinker more. Kinda like the difference between someone who buys a computer intact, and someone who buys the parts and assembles it him/herself. In the end, if you do it right, you end up with a fine computer. Its just that one take significantly more tinkering than the other. Both take time and research and effort, its just that one takes more. And either can critically fail or succeed based on what they are working with. And most importantly, neither is a wrong way, its just a different approach.

Maybe the one common thread in poly people is that we are all process people.

Could be. Or not. Your opinion's mileage may vary as well.